


Mac Fails to Cover Up the Truth

by Legs (InsanityRule)



Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-17
Updated: 2015-04-17
Packaged: 2018-03-23 08:14:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3761134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsanityRule/pseuds/Legs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And here Mac thought public stuff would be fun.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mac Fails to Cover Up the Truth

**Author's Note:**

> I have transcended garbage

Mac is breathing heavily. The bar is empty, except for him and-  
The door bangs open.  
Because of course someone would come in when his dick is in Dennis’ mouth.  
And of course it’s Dee, that bitch.  
“Just you today?” Dee begins kicking stools into their places by the bar.  
Mac kicks Dennis further under the counter, but Dennis drags him forward, the perverted bastard.  
“ Uh, yeah?” He squeaks. “Den’s getting -groan- some uh… oranges.”  
“Oranges?” Dee sweeps some trash under a table with her shoe. “Why oranges?”  
“T-tropical night, don’t youuu… shit, remember? Oranges. You know.”  
“You feeling okay?”  
“Fine, great,” his eyes close. “You know what we need Dee? Music. Fuck. Yeah, music.” His voice gets higher as he adds, “maybe you can get some?”  
“We have a jukebox.”  
“But tropical music Dee,” getting louder, “so yeah just leave and get some maybe Beach BoYS I DON’T KNOW THAT SOUNDS FINE.”  
Mac is leaning on the counter. He’s sweating.  
Dee is wary. “Yeah, sure. I’ll get some.”  
Mac nods. “Great leave now huRRY SHIT.”  
Dee makes a horrified face Mac doesn’t see. She leaves. Mac sighs only to tense when Charlie enters.  
“Hey dude, woah you okay?” Mac is getting sweaty. “Dude you better not be sick we’re doing the crossword for free baseball tickets it’s due today!”  
“Yeah, uh, I’m okay Charlie,” smacks the bar top, “but uh we need decorations the crossword has to wait Jesus will you stop?”  
“What?”  
“Stop uh… by the store? I’ll help when you get back okay buddy shit you’re the worst, uh I mean the bar’s the worst tropical place dude gotta jazz it up- Jesus!” Mac grips his hair.  
Charlie backs away. “Uh, so like palm tree shit? Sure. Uh… see you Mac.”  
Mac sighs. “Jesus Christ Dennis I swear to God if you don’t stop-” Frank walks in. “Are you kidding me!?”  
Frank walks over. “Where’s Charlie? He’s gonna help me with Wolf Cola rebranding.”  
“Getting decorations he’ll be back Jesus shit maybe you should go to the office? Get a… a suckling pig! For tropical night!”  
Frank shrugs. “Can never have too many suckling pigs. I’ll get my guys on it.”  
As Frank exits Dee returns.  
“YOU’RE JOKING.”  
“I had a couple CDs. Look, Beach Boys. Want me to pop it in?”  
Mac nods. “Yeah crank that shit.”  
Dee puts the CD in their player. She chooses ‘I Get Around’. “Sounds great!”  
Mac nods. Dee fiddles with the volume, facing away from Mac. It’s too loud to hear Mac, but he slumps forward onto the bar top, boneless.  
Dee turns it down. “Good song. Very, fitting.” Mac gives a thumbs up, face still on the counter. “Doing okay?”  
“Awesome. I mean, it’s an awesome song.”  
“Yeah it is. I’m going to get some more music.”  
Mac sits on the floor behind the counter and glares at Dennis, who’s looking rather smug.  
“You suck dude.”  
“I’m pretty sure that’s the point.” Mac flops on top of Dennis and closes his eyes. “That was fun we’ll have to do it again sometime.”  
Mac is mumbling, “you’re the worst ever dude.”  
“Only at your expense.”  
Mac is snoring in Dennis’ lap when Dee returns.  
“He does know we all know what went down right?”  
“I’m sure if he doesn’t it’s denial and not genuine stupidity.” He’s rubbing the base of Mac’s skull. “Find anymore CDs?”  
“No. Do we have to do a Goddamned theme night to let Mac stay in denial?”  
“I’m sure his fragile self esteem would appreciate it.”  
“You just want him to let you do that again.”  
“Yeah it’s mostly that.”


End file.
